When I was a kid, my mom was really into making my siblings and me watch Barney. The magical purple and green dinosaur was a great role model for tiny children, so now that I’m older and thinking about it, I’m not that surprised my mom was so insistent on making us watch his show. One of the many lessons that we learned from Barney was how to have good manners. Ah, yes, the good ‘ol ‘please’ and ‘thank you,’ cleaning up after your messes (I have the clean-up song burned into my memory at this point), and sharing your toys and games with other kids were all important manners to have.
Here are some tips on how to translate those proper manners of yours to a TTRPG setting.
Pay Attention
Paying attention to the game is vital. Even if you aren’t currently the one RPing, or it isn’t your turn in a battle sequence, you need to pay attention in order to be ready for what’ll come next. Many of the players I’ve DMed for have actively taken notes throughout the campaign so that they can remember the names of the NPCs, locations, et cetera. Whilst I don’t believe you have to do that, that is one way to make sure that you’re keeping focused on the game. I also think that you should limit your phone use, as there have been multiple instances of one of my players or myself looking at our phone and suddenly missing a ton of information. It’s also respectful towards the dungeon master as they’ve put a great deal of time and energy into creating a fun campaign experience.
Be Respectful & Mature
Respect is a must! It goes a long way, not only in D&D but in real life too. Respect to your fellow players and respect to your dungeon master means not talking over them, actively collaborating with them, and overall, just not being a total butthead. Maturity is essential as well because unless there is an agreement not to take things seriously, it can wind up offending someone if you joke about something they were taking seriously. This also applies to any 18+ situations that might happen throughout your campaign.
Listen to the DM
I’m not going to be the DM that insists my word is the law. I make mistakes; honestly, I’ve messed up a few campaigns from not correctly reading the rules or the stats of a monster. However, if there is a disagreement at the table, it is ultimately up to the dungeon master on how they want to proceed. If you disagree with how the dungeon master does their thing, leave or run your own game. It’s okay not to enjoy a DM’s style, but if you’re at their table, you should respect their rules and the way they run the game as they’re the ones who’ve created everything – for the most part, at least.
Character Mortality
Your character might die – that is simply how it goes in Dungeons & Dragons. As someone known as a chronic character dier, I have had my fair share of experiences dying. In some cases, your player character might be brought back to life by some deity or the other players hauling your dead body to a priest – but sometimes you just stay dead. When this happens, please do not get mad at your dungeon master. D&D is not a game where you live forever as some sort of overlord. Characters will die and characters should be made to be destructible. That’s half of the fun!
Sharing the Spotlight
The critical thing to remember about Dungeons & Dragons is that it isn’t an RPG that entirely revolves around you. When you’re in a group, you must remember that all the characters are technically the main characters here. Let others have their moment, whether it be a dramatic monologue or an encounter with their long-lost cousin’s boyfriend’s uncle’s cat’s flea. It’ll be your time to shine soon enough!
It’s always important to remember that Dungeons & Dragons is a collaborative game and unless everyone at the table works together, the game will inevitably fall apart. If you’re ever unsure of anything, don’t hesitate to ask your dungeon master or one of your fellow players. We were all new to the game once!
